Thursday, August 18, 2011

August 18, 2011: Coming Down the Pike...


Holy cow, T-minus 3.5 days till Julian emerges!

Gotta a couple of tasks left (scour the house over the weekend, set up the swing, convert the crib, and of course, buy that attachment to read my Scandisk), but man, we are coming down the pike here!  It really hit me today when I was informing my colleagues at the hospital that I wouldn't see them for 2 weeks.  There is always so much on my plate that sometimes I don't get present to something that is upcoming, because frankly I am present to the 65 things on my plate today! LOL.  One of my big challenges is project management, because I go go go from one day to the next that I have a hard time keeping my eye on the long term clock as well.  I have several work-related projects right now that are giving me daily anxiety because this just isn't my strength.  Oh well, everything regarding Julian's arrival is going pretty according to plan, so that's good.

On the flipside, I'm really bummed that I have come to the end of Bella's pictures.  I have the perfect picture to end with on Sunday, which means I have tonight to pick one last picture.  I feel like I'm gonna lose a piece of her all over again.  I, too, have come to practically depend on the 3 photos a week to keep her present in my life.  I have the photo collage posters our friends made for the CA memorial in my office and in the kids' room to look at daily, but the ritual of ending the posts with a picture of her... Maybe I'll start over... have Julian's pic of the day on top, and Bella's on the bottom, but what about Ali?  That would be really tedious as her pics are on a separate hard drive and when I moved them there, the hard drive "organized them" in its own way so they are a little disjunct in their order.  I dunno,  I just thought I might be leaving Ali out of it if I bookend with photos of Julian and Bella.  The blog is still "Bella's Blessings," so I don't want her pictures to go away.  I know I've blogged about this before, but the day is just about upon me.  Start over or stop... hmmm...

I'm tired.

5 hours of coaching and mastermind calls with no break await me from 9-3 tomorrow, so I think I'm gonna hit the hay.  Have I mentioned in addition to loving my work at the hospital, how much I love coaching people?  It is such a privilege to walk with someone and encourage/motivate/inspire them to live their best life possible.  The inspiration THEY feel when they accomplish things they either thought impossible/ unattainable, or have just procrastinated on for what seems like forever... it is a joy to witness.  I am really blessed to make an impact in people's lives in both lines of work.  Good stuff.  I think I have put it out there maybe once before, but if you have been thinking about the difference having a coach would make in your business/career/family, drop me a line and we'll chat about it.  Email me at

Hey - off topic here, but Christin, you posted a comment on Sunday about your boy Matthew.  You should email my wife Angelique at  She has been working on an awesome "fundraiser-in-a-box" document that equips and empowers anyone looking to fundraise!  Thanks for the comment, and good luck on your EB journey with Matthew.  If there is ANYTHING we can do to support you, email us.  We're here for you.

Okay, falling asleep here.  Gonna try doing that in bed instead of at my desk.  I think it'll  be more comfortable.  Much love and gratitude to you all for still being here with my family and me.  You inspire me to live my best life possible, because I know I'll be reporting to you 3x a week on it! LOL.  Thanks for keeping me accountable for leading my best life!

God night.


  1. Aww. That photo is so moving. I say end the Blog with Bella photos always! I love seeing her and it feels so right when you type "God night" and then show us her. Like I am getting a glimpse of heaven. Post Julian and Ali through out when talking about their latest happenings... but Bella is always in our hearts too, please don't stop showing her photos!

    That adapter is easy peasey, takes about 10 seconds to use!

    Good luck with Julian's arrival... let Ang know we are thinking of her and praying for a smooth delivery- can't wait!! Ali must be so excited!!

    Love you guys! Tracey

  2. Why would you not continue posting photos of Little Bella??!!

  3. I like the idea of starting with Baby J and ending with Bella. I love seeing those photos of Bella at the end. You usually have a few Ali pics here and there too. This was a great choice for a pic tonight...I can't believe how sweet she looks. She is looking at you with those eyes that you can tell know faaaarrrrr beyond what any of us do...right?

    I can't wait for Julian!

  4. How about mixing it up...Julian one day...then Ali...the best of both worlds. But always include Bella. I love the picture of Bella. It makes me want to lie next to her.

    So excited...Julian is almost here.

    Sending my love to all, sweet kisses for Ali and belly rubs for Julian.

    Denise WI

  5. My advice is do what feels best on any given day. Mix it up if you wish. After all she is not forgotten. :o)
    Ali and Julian will bring new light and joy and she will never be forgotten. Ali will be able to tell stories when she grows up as she looks at those pictures.
    Julian will know who she is as he gets older too.
    The two of them will bring you a lot of joy. You will never forget Bella or the mark that she left on all of you or the EB community.
    Much good will come as you build upon the past.


  6. I REALLY like that picture of Bella. It's cool how the light is only on her and the it's dark in front of the camera. :) I think you should keep posting Bella picutes or make your Bella slide show bigger off to the side. Then the blog is still a big part of the blog. Good luck deciding! Can't wait for Monday!

  7. I LOVE that you end each post with a picture of sweet Bella.It would be nice if you continued to do that and add pictures of Ali and Julian throughout your post :)

  8. Tim,

    Never before has a picture of Bella brought tears to my eyes, but that one does. I say do whatever feels right. Personally, I will never get enough of her beautiful eyes; they seem to say so much! And for me, when I first found your blog, Bella was already intubated and looked quite different. The baby girl I prayed for had her eyes closed....

    Please give Angelique our good wishes. I can't wait to see Julian, too. I wonder if Bella passed along those eyes!?

    Karen Steiner
    Denver, CO

  9. What about starting over with pictures of Bella? This way we can watch how she developed during the same time as Julian is developing.

  10. We are praying for you all and can't wait to see about Julian's arrival on Monday. I know that Sara is so excited, too! I would love to continue seeing Bella photos. I love them all so much!

  11. Can't believe he's almost here! We're so excited for you, and are praying for Julian's safe arrival and for Ang to be healthy as well.

    I love the photos of sweet Bella - couldn't imagine not seeing them! My guess is that you'll find a way to get all three kids in here - whether they are all on a post at the same time, or if you just have a Julian or Bella or Ali day.

    Hope the weekend is great for all of you!

    Love from TX,
    Laura (for Team A)

  12. Such a thrilling and such a sad time, as you prepare to be a family of five with Bella no longer physically present. But, my oh my, she's very much here, lighting up people's lives across the world.

    I am beyond excited about Julian's imminent arrival - I have a splendid view over the ocean from my rooftop and I am looking south, kind of in your direction! I see blue skies and smooth waters ahead, literally and metaphorically. By next weekend, your son will be in your arms, almost a week old already. What a wonderful thought,

    Fondly, ever and always,


  13. I am sitting here thinking I send you a personal message on FB or put it here for the world to see. It is hard to admit...but... I failed miserably today. I sold ZERO cupcakes. The weather didnt cooperate and the few customers we had had no interest in cupcakes. I came here tonight to look at Bellas beautiful picture, to cry (like that would make me feel better) and to "talk" to her. It feels like I have in let down/failed her and let down/failed you. But instead of sitting down and pigging out on 75 cupcakes I have decided to not admitted defeat and plan to do it all over again next month with my next garage sale and to ask around local businesses to set up a bake sale stand.

    As always...sending my love to all, kisses for Ali and belly rubs for Julian.

    Denise WI

  14. Tim and family, My prayers are with you. I haven't commented for awhile, but I've been here. Bella will always be in your heart even though she's not by you side. She is your Guardian Angel, watching over her earthly family. Time does heal all wounds. I lost my Mom almost 20 years ago. She passed one month before my first child was born. I still think about her almost daily, but it's a good feeling even though I miss her. Occasionally, it brings sadness, just like it will for you. When it does, just hold Julian and know she's watching over you.
    Love and prayers,