Ripples in the Pond...

Ripples in the Pond...

...more on that later.

First the bad this time...

Bella's head...well...let's just say she is now doing her best Kareem Abdul Jabaar impersonation (see photo gallery). The blisters were coming so fast and so many on her head we had to wrap her head to try to help keep it under control. Now, she is roasting due to covered limbs and a bandaged head. She has three wounds on her face: one under the left eye which is healing well, one over the right eye which is healing well, and a new giant wound across the bridge of her nose down onto her left cheek which, though it looks huge and MUST be painful, it is clean and responding well to aquaphor. We are now adding colloidal silver to her feeds to boost cellular recovery and aid the immune system. She will receive colloidal silver for only 7 days, then off. It isn't intended for long term use. We are also using Mepilex Ag (foam pad infused with silver) again on the left foot as it has just been such a mess for so long...not to mention I have a stockpile of Ag in the garage and very little straight mepilex. Mepilex works the best on elbows, so we are using it up on elbows. Hands continue to look clean and blister free.

okay okay, now onto the good.

Ready for The Ultimate Dose of Providence? Check this out...

Sunday morning, it was my turn to do the offertory at church. What that means is I go up in front of the congregation and say something about giving. Then, music plays as they pass the plate for contributions. I like doing the offertory, because I get the chance to preach a little! I have been on the schedule doing this maybe once a quarter for maybe two years, and the congregation always gives me really nice compliments for whatever it is God happens to say through me, as if I am the source. I always thank them graciously, but I am just a conduit - a transformer. It's not from me, it's through me. Simple as that.

Anyway, there I was, up in front with a wonderful plan. I led the congregation through a guided imagery/visualization experience. Oh heck, I'll lead you through it, too. However, you can't actually do it since you would have to close your eyes...and then you wouldn't be able to read on! So, here it is (approximately)...

"I want you to close your eyes. Close 'em! Remember, I can see every one of you, and I can see if your eyes are open so, close 'em! Picture you are 8 years old again. Just a boy or a girl. You are standing on the edge of a pond. It is summer, and it is early evening. The crickets are cricketing, and the bullfrogs have just started doin' their thing. You look out over the pond. The sky above is waning, and the water is still and looks like a sheet of glass. You look down and see a large pebble, and you just can't resist. Being the 8 year old that you are, you pick up that pebble and lob it into the center of the pond. It makes a piercing splash, darting through the evening peace and serenity. You see the splash, and you are happy. Then, you begin to notice the ripples in the pond's surface that the pebble caused.

Now I ask you: does the pebble know the blade of grass growing at the edge of the far side of the pond that its wave just fed? Does it know the baby dear that will eat and be nourished by the blade of grass? Or how about the little child who will gaze upon that dear in awe in a different field on a different day? You just threw that pebble because it was fun.

Now I tell you: You have no idea how far your gifts reach. YOU have NO idea how far your gifts reach."

Then I broke into an abbreviated, a cappella version of a song I wrote called "Ripples in the Pond" I sang,

"Sometimes you never know
How far the ripples go
When you throw yourself into the pond called life.
Sometimes you never know
How far the ripples go
But you throw yourself back in again and again
With a smile

But Jesus what you need to know is who you are for us
For we are now the cause of the ripples in the pond
Who knows where or when we first threw ourselves in
But we all know what's true is that we're still splashing
Because of you

Sometimes you never know
How far the ripples go
When you throw yourself into the pond called life.
Sometimes you never know
How far the ripples go
But you throw yourself back in again and again
With a smile"

THAT SAME MORNING...

...in a church in a nearby city, a minister was giving her sermon. She was a visiting minister to the church. The details were delivered to Ang's mom at a car club meeting in a third different city Sunday night. A club member mentioned to Carolyn that the minister was telling the story of a little girl who was recently born with a rare skin disease, and of her parents and their faith, and this woman realized that this minister was indeed speaking of Carolyn's grandchild! The woman merely said the minister's name was Karen...

...could it be Rev. Karen Reddick? Our old choir director and friend? Although Karen left our congregation a few months ago, she has followed Bella's story on this very site. So, while I was preaching, "You have no idea how far your gifts reach," Karen was preaching about us.

We are all connected, my friends. Our thoughts, our feelings, OUR PRAYERS, our actions. They resonate throughout this world in ways we barely understand. But make no mistake, we cause the ripples in the pond every day.

What ripples are you making?

The Five Percent Collective Has Been Born

Happy Monday! Since most of you will read this Monday morning...to those night owls on the West coast...go to bed already! (Listen to me...I should talk)

Well, I shouldn't have made that joke about once, twice, thrice a night. Thursday night, Bella let all Hell break loose and mommy and daddy pretty much didn't sleep a wink. During that night, Bella showed us a new scream that made our blood freeze. It happened on several occasions. She would be lying on the bed, legs and arms out, seemingly relaxed, when suddenly out of nowhere, her eyes would get big and she'd start screaming like someone was setting her feet on fire. It would persist for probably only 5-10 seconds, but it felt like eternity. The scream was louder and more violent than ANYTHING she has said or done to date. Ouch. I called in sick to work to stay home and 1) rest myself, and 2) monitor the situation. We did wound care that afternoon and her left foot was just awful. the wound spread further out in all directions and now the entire top, side, and part of bottom of the foot is a blister. This poor foot has had maybe 2 days since birth where it wasn't injured.

On the bright side, I'm learning how to wrap her hands and fingers with 1" gauze and a cotton ball in the palm in such a way that is preventing new blisters, and keeping her hands in a neutral position, so there's a victory.

Ali had a BLAST at my friend Vicki's house for the Chapman University Music Therapy reunion yesterday. That was a good thing as well.

The best thing was returning to church this morning for the first time since this journey began. Our church is our extended family. They have loved us and cared for us since we first arrived in CA 5 years ago. Not a day goes by that we are not gifted in some way by someone in the congregation. It was so nice to be able to bring Bella to church, have Ali resume Sunday school, and personally say, "Thank you." I also got to sing "Bella's Song" during Offertory and that was just great. When the chorus repeats at the end of the song, I spontaneously told the congregation to sing along, and they did! Even though it was their first time (for many) hearing it, they had internalized it and I could here their voices floating through the Sanctuary mixing with mine. What a wonderful moment and perfect symbol of the interlacing of love, passion, and community we share at Harbor Christian Church. God is Good...ALL THE TIME!

Lastly, a concerned member of the congregation sat us down with our pastor to make sure we were doing everything we could for Bella with respect to pursuing research studies and clinical trials, as well as couple's support groups. She mentioned that 95% of marriages end up in divorce when there is a child with special needs. I knew that in the Autism world the number was 80%, but I didn't know it was higher overall. I was immediately reminded of the conversation that young man Sean Stephenson had with me early on. He is a clinical Psychologist, and he said to me on the phone, "Tim, Bella's situation is going to do one of two things to your marriage. It's gonna tear it apart, or make it stronger. You have to decide which one it's gonna be RIGHT NOW." Well, I did, and we did. We choose Bella, We choose her EB, and we choose our marriage, exactly as it is.

We had a tender conversation over dinner discussing this, and out of the conversation, we came up with a new concept. It's called simply, 5 PERCENT. It is a support group of parents of children with special needs who are committed to being in the 5 % of the statistic. The way we have always seen our marriage and life in general is you can create it or react to it. Sometimes, it takes a little of both, but now that Bella is here exactly the way she is, we get to create a new level of power and support for others just like us, and for this, we are truly grateful and blessed to be able to be of service.

We are so grateful for the show of concern. Our friend was afraid of overstepping their boundaries, but the context was love and genuine care, not judgment or fear. In that spirit, we say again, "Thank you" for having the courage to step up and share! Thanks to that conversation, the 5 PERCENT Collective has been born.

So, if you or anyone you know has a child or children with special needs, and wants to be a part of a group that affirms their role as creator and not victim, please tell them about us. We want to hear from them. It's easy to feel the victim when something like this happens, but that leaves us with NO POWER, NO SAY, NO FREEDOM to create the beautiful tomorrow that is just around the corner.

Now, since tomorrow is creeping around the corner faster and faster every minute I type, I now bid you fare well. May God bless your day, giving you momentum to flow effortlessly through the week. May He open your awareness to the blessings He is surrounding you with RIGHT NOW, so that all you see this week, starting RIGHT NOW, is bliss. Wherever you are reading this, I want you to SEE one of those blessings and post it here as a comment. Let us all know! THIS is what should be news, folks, BLESSINGS, NOT TRAGEDIES. Let us make our own news headlines on this page today. Let us remind each other that there is good in the world everywhere. Now, tell us what YOU see!

Bless you all,

Good night.